How great was that party the other night? I only called my mom about five, okay ten, times to check on the twins. It's just... amazing how worried I got about being away from them for the first time. And being a dad is really great it's just amazing that Haley and I made those two really adorable babies. Right now they're in their cribs sleeping and listening to my music. Which means I finally got to update this thing.

Oh, and I'm never going to worry about becoming like Dan ever again, I could never do what he did. I could never kill my own brother. Speaking of my brother, Lucas and I agreed that we're never going to visit Dan. Lucas also has some really awesome news that he told me but I'll let him tell you himself it's that great.

I found out something that... I can't even begin to understand. The only people I'm sure will know what I am talking about are Lucas, my mom, and the person I'm talking about. I thought that he was different that he had changed, that he was changing, that he was a better person and that he was finally beginning to become a person I could look up to. And I even told him that! Man was I wrong. He is not a part of my family anymore and he never will be again. I don't care if any of you think I'm turning my back on him, when you find out the truth like I did you'll change your minds so there's no point in arguing with me or even Lucas as I have no doubt he feels the same.

As far the rest of the stuff going on? I'm even more scared of being a father now that I've seen Lucas' baby sister and my cousin, I started working with Skills' dad at the factory and while I was visiting my uncle Keith's grave for the first time, I talked with Whitey and... he gave me a really surprising offer....

So basketball's out. Whitey told me that I lost my scholarship to Duke and since then I've called every basketball college I've ever considered going to. No one wants me. Which I knew was going to happen once I made that speech. Not even Whitey can help me like Haley suggested. But at least she's still going to be the Valedictorian at graduation, I really got through to Turner. I guess that's another good reason to be married in high school, you can really relate to people in power who are also married.

Anyway, it looks like it's Dan Scott Motors for me.

OOC: Amber, I still have to post our RP from last week but I wasn't sure if you wanted to add a better ending to it or not since it sort of ends mid-conversation. Let me know :)

I saw something really disturbing the other day when I went to talk to my dad. Him dancing.

At least I know why I can't dance...

Okay, that assignment today was actually kind of cool. Wait, did I, Nathan Scott say something about school that has nothing to do with basketball was cool? I think I need to go to the doctor now...

Anyways, I got to hang out with Peyton, which was great and I found out some pretty funny stuff about her. I really didn't expect her to tell me the secret she did. It was really out there. And I kind of think it was to cheer me up after what I told her. Also, her picture didn't exactly turn out that great, but that's understandable. And I guess this is like... whatever town or city or whatever where its what happened there, stays there so that's all I'm saying about it.

And I should really get to bed now, shouldn't I? But its not my fault, Haley stole my computer from me again earlier so I had to go on a lot later than usual.

Deb Scott is not my mom. She doesn't exist to me. And don't you dare say anything to contradict that.

Want to know how I came to this conclusion? It's simple really. The day she attempted to commit suicide she came to our apartment to see me, she knocked Haley to the ground. Haley and I thought everything was okay, until she went to the doctor. As it turns out, and you probably know from Haley, we're having two kids, a boy and a girl. But thanks to Deb, that might not wind up happening. The doctor told Hales that our daughter isn't growing the way she should be and that we might in fact 'lose' her. And if we do, its all Deb's fault.

You know I used to look the other way when she did something stupid, like when she took drugs the first time, when she chose her pills over me, when she had an affair when I was little and even not too long after I found out she'd tried to do something much much worse. But I never called her on any of it. But this? This is much worse and I'm not looking the other way again. I can't and I won't.

I'm not going to let anything happen to Haley, Michael, our daughter, or me if only for Haley's sake.

As everyone's probably noticed thanks to Haley's entry (geez, Hales, did you really have to hog the computer that long? Just kidding...), she's back home. But she's not relaxing like she's supposed to be. Luke, has this girl ever relaxed a day in her life? And get better, man, we miss you. I'll try and visit you with Haley later after things settle down a bit here some more.

So a lot's happened since the accident. Accident yeah right. One of the worst things I've thought possible has partially happened. I hate putting pressure on Haley to choose when I know she loves me but after everything that happened, how can I not feel this way? And my dad's still in jail. I haven't visited him in awhile but I don't know how I can, not to mention I have no idea if he'll even let me considering he knows what one of the things I'm going to say is.

By the way, triangles suck.

Has anyone ever told you "it's okay" or "it's going to be okay"? Because that's all everyone's telling me right now and that I'm a hero. As if tomorrow none of this will have happened, that Haley and I will have renewed our vows, gotten into the limo and just gone on our honeymoon to London. But that's not going to happen. Tomorrow, I'll wake up next to Haley in our apartment, and everything will have still happened. Uncle Coop and Rachel will be in the hospital, Haley and I won't be on our honeymoon in London and we'll be awaiting all the bills from the cost of our wedding and my stay at the hospital. If I didn't have Haley, life would seriously suck right now.

~Nathan